What are some funny and smart quotes?

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

🔥Why has Prime Narendra Modi become Extremely FRUSTRATED and Highly DEPRESSED because he has NOT been invited by Donald Trump to witness his Oath Ceremony for his INAUGURATION on 20th January as the next PRESIDENT of USA? Does the DESPERATE Narendra Modi FEAR that Donald Trump's actions may even LEAD to the FALL of the BJP-led MINORITY Government in India, as such actions have already caused GREAT PANIC in the NDA Coalition?

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

Why do I have the impression that almost all questions about advertising the flat Earth theory come from people who don't believe in a flat Earth themselves and are just provoking?

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”

Why are people with borderline personality disorder so capable of ripping someone apart with their words?

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.